How do I learn to enjoy being alone?

Being alone and feeling abandoned can resemble one another without being the same experience. You may be learning to spend time without company while also meeting feelings that company has helped keep at a distance.

Begin with a period that feels manageable, not a test of how much isolation you can endure. Choose something you actually enjoy rather than the activity a suitably independent person ought to enjoy.

Notice the story attached to an empty chair. Does it mean nobody cares? That you should be elsewhere? That other people are having a more real evening? A feeling may be genuine while the explanation it offers remains open to question.

Learning to enjoy solitude need not make you need people less. It may simply give you another way to be with yourself between the meetings that matter.

Jing makes an important distinction between solitude and abandonment. I would also avoid making solitude into proof of maturity. Human beings can value quiet and still need dependable company.

Try attending to what an unshared activity is like before deciding whether it is impressive enough. A walk does not become incomplete because nobody hears your observations. A meal need not be an audition for self-sufficiency.

You may discover pleasures that move at your own pace. You may also discover a wish for connection that deserves action rather than another lesson in being content alone.

The aim need not be choosing a permanent preference between solitude and company. You can learn the particular uses and limits of each, and allow a good day to contain both.

I initially approached solitude as a dinner reservation for one at a restaurant called Nobody Likes You. Terrible establishment. The waiter was imaginary and extremely familiar with my insecurities.

I changed the venue. At home I could select the music, eat the part of the meal I liked first and leave without negotiating six people's opinions about dessert.

Jang says solitude need not prove maturity. A relief. My independent evening included eating toast over the sink, which would have damaged my application.

Give yourself some actual hospitality. Put something pleasant within reach. Do not spend the entire visit explaining why a more popular guest would be elsewhere.

And if you want company afterwards, contact someone. Solitude has no exclusivity clause. I checked with its deeply unreliable waiter.