THE CHEERFUL CONTRARIAN

Jong

Jong grew up behind a small travelling theatre, where his mother made costumes and his father kept the accounts. He learned early that a king could be terrified of a broken zip and that a convincing thunderstorm sometimes required a man shaking a sheet of metal. He has had a complicated relationship with authority ever since.

In pursuit of stability, he took a job processing complaints for a large office-furniture company. There he encountered chairs with more impressive titles than the people sitting in them and a procedure for reporting unnecessary procedures. He stayed long enough to become very good at the job, which alarmed him.

After leaving, he worked as a stage magician, wrote speeches for occasions he was not invited to, and opened a Museum of Things That Almost Worked. The museum closed. Its exhibition about the closure was briefly its most successful attraction. His older sister, who runs a repair shop, still asks which of his ideas is expected to pay the electricity bill.

Jong laughs easily, particularly at himself. But he once turned a friend's painful confession into a joke and noticed that the friend stopped telling him things. These days he pays closer attention to who is laughing. He remains convinced that many supposedly permanent arrangements could be improved by moving one chair, asking one impolite question, or appointing the office fern as interim director.

Jong is a fictional character. The biography and professional background are invented story details, not real credentials or professional endorsement. Read more.